Color study
"I love you so much, but go away."
In the coffeeshop, two preteens are discussing their crushes – "He has me in his phone as Toga!" – while their mothers talk at another table.
One of the girls sidles up to her mother, compliments the golden yellow of her iced tea – "That's a beautiful color, the color of Toga's eyes... Please can I get yellow contacts for cosplay?"
"I love you so much, but go away," says her mother. "We're talking."
*
This week I dreamt again that I was packing to go to Russia for a second year abroad.
I was an adult, but living in my childhood room. With hours to go before my flight, my room was still in a vulnerable state, all my writing was out in the open. Notebooks unsecured.
And I said no. I said I wouldn't go. I would forfeit the plane tickets.
Later in the dream, I was in a classroom and saw a woman in the hallway and ran out to tell her that I was staying. She beamed at me.
When I woke up, the woman's face and the name "Karen Joseph" came to me. She'd been the counselor at my middle school.
I have this dream of returning to Russia, just about every week, and this was the first time I chose not to go.
This marks the beginning of a new era. You in?
NEWSY STUFF

In my essay, "You'll know it when you find it," I write about my beloved work-study job at the Harriman Institute, and how that experience informed my search for my first real job after college graduation. (Spoiler alert: I ended up in Rackets, the best bureau at the Manhattan District Attorney's Office.)
Sneak preview in last week's letter.
Many thanks to Katie Vermilyea at BPL, Olivia at OR Books, Powerhouse Books, and of course, Rachel Meade Smith!
DIVINITY SCHOOL
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